Don't like posting nothing, so here's something.



With insomniac LA production execs nipping at my heels, paranoid marketing gophers digging holes in my creative garden, a nose so stuffed I can hardly breathe, a sore throat that won't be soothed, three days to complete a campaign for the Parent Company and a two pound stack of tax related papers to sort through so I can make life easier for the accountant I pay to do it for me-- I’m too wiped to write, so feel free to scroll down and see if anything strikes your fancy from this box of saved up odds and ends (mostly cartoons) ... and my apologies for the sloppy lay-out, I just don't have the time.














“I’ve searched all the parks in all the cities and found no statues of committees.”
― G.K. Chesterton












































































"It profits me but little that a vigilant authority always protects the tranquillity of my pleasures and constantly averts all dangers from my path, without my care or concern, if this same authority is the absolute master of my liberty and my life."

--Alexis de Tocqueville, Democracy in America
















































My son Eli once remarked, “ the three most beautiful words in English are: I love you—and the four most beautiful are: Mets win Yankees lose.”




























At the end of Joyce Cary’s novel The Horse’s Mouth, Gulley Jimson suffers a paralyzing stroke, and can no longer paint. As he is being taken to hospital, a nun who is nursing him remarks that he should be praying instead of laughing, "Same thing, Mother." replies Jimson, his last words.























"Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity." 
-Anonymous


We had fed the heart on fantasy,
The heart’s grown brutal from the fare
-William Butler Yeats

Recipe for PopSocioCultural Non-Fiction Best Seller:

Flatter Liberals by telling them that their altruistic and ethics based inclinations are by-products of their superior intelligence—but at the same time (Counter-Intuitively--By Golly!) are also the most potent assets for acquiring wealth.

Flatter Conservatives by telling them that their self interested and acquisitive inclinations are byproducts of their superior intelligence—but at the same time (Counter-Intuitively-- By Golly!) are also the most potent assets for cultivating an altruistic and ethics based life.

Flatter yourself for having amassed the requisite data and more importantly the anecdotal evidence in order to provide the basis for never before revealed insights and wisdom that have the power to change your life and provide genuine “Eureka” solutions to life’s most puzzling riddles.

In short—if you are mentally stuck between a rock and a hard place, put Malcolm in the middle.




I can't resist. I've tried to 'accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative' on this blog and steer clear of shooting fish in a barrel or skewering rotten meat on my grill, but this guy has pushed me too far. On the train, in the office, in the media, he's staring out at me and daring me to dive in and learn the special secrets that only he with his x-ray zeitgeist vision can detect and decode...and well, I just can't take it anymore..


...so I reached out to an old buddy in the hope that he could come to my aid and use his protean powers of pretense-free persuasion to clear the drain of dogmatic doodoo and stem the tide of vacuous voodoo emanating from the omnipresent frizzy headed oracle of obviousness. Take it away boys...and may the best man win....(go Homer!)



MALCOLM: “The key to good decision making is not knowledge. It is understanding. We are swimming in the former. We are desperately lacking in the latter.”

HOMER Weaseling out of things is important. It’s what separates us from the animals. Except the weasel.

MG: “Practice isn't the thing you do once you're good. It's the thing you do that makes you good.”

HS: If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing

MG: “In fact, researchers have settled on what they believe is the magic number for true expertise: ten thousand hours.”

HS: Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, 14% of people know that.

MG: “No one who can rise before dawn three hundred sixty days a year fails to make his family rich.”

HS: I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life.
Number 1: Cover for me.
Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss!
Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

MG: “Achievement is talent plus preparation”

HS: All my life I've had one dream, to achieve my many goals.

MG: We learn by example and by direct experience because there are real limits to the adequacy of verbal instruction.

HS: Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.

MG: “Emotion is contagious.”

HS: Homer no function beer well without.

MG: To achieve your goals, you don’t need to be brilliant, talented, or rich. You just need to persevere, hope for the right timing, and focus on taking one small step at a time in the direction of your dreams.

HS: That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!

MG: “We cling to the idea that success is a simple function of individual merit and that the world in which we all grow up and the rules we choose to write as a society don't matter at all.”

HS: You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel

MG::“Who we are cannot be separated from where we're from.”

HS: If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it --Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers!

MG: We all want to believe we make completely rational decisions …But even the smartest shopper is constantly manipulated in subtle psychological ways.

HS: You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had an electrified fooling machine.

MG: …S.U.V.s tend to be bought by people who are insecure, vain, self-centered, and self-absorbed, who are frequently nervous about their marriages, and who lack confidence in their driving skills.


HS: And I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk! 


THANK YOU GENTLEMEN. REFRESHMENTS WILL BE SERVED IN THE LOBBY.



"> A vague recollection confirmed -- Father Brown in the Father Brown Detective Mystery series by G.K. Chesterton and Gulley Jimson from The Trilogy (Herself Surprised, To Be A Pilgrim, The Horse’s Mouth,) by Joyce Cary –were both played by Alec Guinness in the movies. And a perfect choice for both despite the fact that Brown is gentle, sweet, level-headed, even-tempered humble, quiet…and Gulley is in almost every way the polar opposite in temperament. A testament to Sir Alec.


Must to Avoid:
In a review about a book concerning The “Freud” wars among those in the psychoanalytic community who apparently have been at each other’s throats since Sigmund smoked his first cigar , there was this excerpt regards a comment the authors make on some gaps they detect in an edition of Freud's letters: 'The result of this omission', they tell us, 'obscured the connections between these scatological hypotheses on the ontogenic recapitulation by the individual of the erotogenic zones abandoned in the course of phylogenesis and the theory of infantile sexuality put forward in the Three Essays in 1905.'

Uncle. Uncle!

Can't recall if I've posted this before, and too lazy to check so here it is...again?
A classic live performance that became legend...and it seems to get fresher every year. If you don't know it, stick with it cause the instrumental intro goes on for a bit, but the vocal and solos are worth waiting for.

1969 Montreux Jazz Festival.
On Atlantic Recording: Swiss Movement
Composed by: Eugene McDaniels

Les McCann: piano, vocals
Eddie Harris: tenor saxophone
Benny Bailey: trumpet
Leroy Vinnegar: bass
Donald Dean: drums

Obama became president, then I got laid off, therefore Obama cost me my job.

D’Antoni resigned, then Knicks won. Therefore, D’Antoni was the problem.

The Rooster crows, then the sun rises. Therefore, roosters cause sunrises.


Post hoc ergo propter hoc, Latin for "after this, therefore because of this," : a logical fallacy of the questionable cause variety…


...and you’ll find it all over the place. At work I sit in meetings listening to similar illogic to explain why certain shows aren’t doing well. We showed it at 10:30, then ratings were low, therefore 10:30 is a bad time slot. Rarely however, do you hear this line of reasoning: The show sucks, therefore no one watches it.


Fictional characters I’ve enjoyed spending time with over the years…with select examples as to why:



Philip Marlowe- Multiple Novels by Raymond Chandler

"You're Marlowe?"
I nodded.
"I'm a little disappointed," he said, "I rather expected something with dirty finger nails."
"Come inside," I said, "and you can be witty sitting down."






Bugs Bunny—by Tex Avery, Ben Hardaway, Chuck Jones , Mel Blanc and many others.

"Eh, you'll be fine if you remember t'ree things. One, your adversaries have tapioca for brains. Two, always eat your carrots. And three, villains always fall for cheesy disguises."






Gulley Jimson- From The Horses Mouth by Joyce Cary

“Plantie is a very strong Protestant, that is to say, he's against all churches, especially the Protestant: and he thinks a lot of Buddha, Karma and Confucius. He is also a bit of an anarchist and three or four years ago he took up Einstein and vitamins.”




BTW: Was reading about Joyce Cary and discovered that in addition to the William Blake influence, there was also his contemporary Stanley Spencer as a model for Gulley Jimson. Some Spencer info and works posted below.




Sully Sullivan- From Nobody’s Fool by Richard Russo

“I'm about to fuck up, he thought clearly, and his next thought was, but I don't have to. This was followed closely by a third thought, the last of this familiar sequence, which was, but I'm going to anyway.”




Raylan Givens- Elmore Leonard character in numerous books.

"Stop. Glen, I don't want you to speak anymore. 'Cause once you start lyin' to me, there's going to be a river between us with no bridge to cross. Do you understand what I'm sayin'? Nod if you do."






Huck Finn- Adventures of Huckleberry Finn…by Mark Twain

"When it was dark I set by my camp fire smoking, and feeling pretty well satisfied; but by and by it got sort of lonesome, and so I went and set on the bank and listened to the current swashing along, and counted the stars and drift logs and rafts that come down, and then went to bed; there ain't no better way to put in time when you are lonesome; you can't stay so, you soon get over it."


Ishmael- Moby Dick , by Herman Melville

"In one word, Queequeg, said I, rather digressively; hell is an idea first born on an undigested apple-dumpling; and since then perpetuated through the hereditary dyspepsias nurtured by Ramadans…. I do not think that my remarks about religion made much impression upon Queequeg…. He looked at me with a sort of condescending concern and compassion, as though he thought it a great pity that such a sensible young man should be so hopelessly lost to evangelical pagan piety."


Cuddy Mangum-- From the Justin and Cuddy novels by James Malone (Uncivil Seasons, Time’s Witness, First Lady)

“At the time, some kind folks thought we had us a moral revolution going that couldn’t slip back; it was racing along the road to glory, chucking war, racism and sexism out the widnows like roadside trash. These sweet Americans could no more imagine a backward slide than Romans could imagine their Forum was going to end up a cow pasture or much less a big litter box for stray cats tiptoeing through the condoms and cigarette butts.”





How the imaginative, playful, contrarian, and desperately overmatched mind deals with mathematics:





Stanley Spencer (30 June 1891 – 14 December 1959)
Stanley Spencer with his old pram chassis walking down a Cookham lane with his easel and canvas.
Upon reading that he was Joyce Cary's model for Gulley Jimson in The Horse's Mouth, I was intrigued to know more. Spent some time online looking at his work and it knocked me out. Prolific and all over the map in style and substance. For more: http://www.stanleyspencer.org.uk/

CLICK TO ENLARGE















More G.K Chesterton:

“A child's instinct is almost perfect in the matter of fighting; a child always stands for the good militarism as against the bad. The child's hero is always the man or boy who defends himself suddenly and splendidly against aggression. The child's hero is never the man or boy who attempts by his mere personal force to extend his mere personal influence. That combination of the hero and bully in one, which people now call the Strong Man or the Superman, would be simply unintelligible to any schoolboy....No; I am not in favour of the child being taught militarism. I am in favour of the child teaching it.”

" Fairy Tales do not tell children that Dragons exist. Children already know that Dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children that dragons can be killed." --G.K. Chesterton


I quoted him a bunch of posts back. And I liked the quote so much I decided to get to know him better. Now I’m just getting into his Book Orthodoxy…partly cause Graham Greene called it “among the great books of the age” and because I left the other book I was reading on the train. He wrote the Father Brown Detective stories, but next I’m going straight to the novel that seems to be considered one of his major works--The Man who was Thursday.

In reading about Chesterton, I came upon The Clerihew. It was invented by Chesterton’s friend, Edmund Clerihew Bentley. and Chesterton wrote a bunch of them.

A clerihew is a whimsical, four-line biographical poem
and has the following properties:

It is biographical and usually whimsical
It pokes fun at mostly famous people
It has four lines of irregular length and metre
The rhyme structure is AABB
The first line contains, and may consist solely of, the subject's name.
.

For example: A clerihew regarding the inventor of the thermos bottle (or Dewar flask):

Sir James Dewar
Is smarter than you are
None of you asses
Can liquify gases.

A modern literary example is:

Ted Hughes,
Sylvia's muse,
was rather good-looking.
Let his wife do the cooking.

In 1983, Games Magazine ran a contest titled "Do You Clerihew?" The winning entry was:

Did Descartes
Depart
With the thought
"Therefore I'm not"?

Looked a lot easier than the Limerick, so I took a crack at it:

Carmelo
much like Jello
Colorful-- full of shimmer
As sustenance? Not a winner.

It’s frontrunner Romney
Who’s Playing the Zombie
In the latest B horror flick
Called Our Bloody Body Politic

There was ring great Henry Armstrong
Moon man Neil, then juiced up Lance pedaled along
But for me it’s just ‘natch
To think only of Satch.

Barack FYI
Is just one guy
And though maybe anomalous
Even Remus had his Romulus


Jim Watson and his lab partner Crick
Were asking themselves “ What’s the trick?”
Then Watson flicked his wrist to see what was the time
“It’s a twist!” Crick cried, “How sublime.”


One more G.K…

"The whole modern world has divided itself into Conservatives and Progressives. The business of Progressives is to go on making mistakes. The business of the Conservatives is to prevent the mistakes from being corrected."

And so it goes…









The superstar supercedes the system. Cause it’s not a game. It’s a business. Show Business. Dolan wants tushies in his seats. Tushies attached to deep pockets that can shell out hundreds of dollars for bad seats and thousands for good ones—and pass along the cost to the consumer for the fancy Garden renovation And like any Broadway producer eager to maximize returns on his investment, the number one asset is star power. Skill, talent, experience, teamwork, dedication, selflessness in service to consistency and long term success—fuggetaboutit. This is New York baby, not Utah.

Anyone who knows anything about Cablevision, the Dolan Family (I know a few who have worked closely with James the hirsute heir—some who made big money there and left for humbler pastures in order to save their souls) or what goes on in the offices at MSG isn’t surprised at this latest development.

Wonder if Isaiah Thomas is waiting in the wings. I doubt it, but still wouldn’t be surprised. Walsh now looks like the lucky one who got out of the nuthouse early.

As a fan though, and I’m just speaking for myself, there’s no upside. Even if they start winning, they’ll be ugly wins. Melo in isolation with everyone clearing to the other side so he can do his schoolyard stuff and go 11 for 28 every night? And when guys tend to stand around on offense, it spills over to defense too. Hustle begets hustle and loitering begets bums.

I was no big D’Antoni fan, but I liked him. He seemed like a good guy and a fair guy. It’s no secret that all the players (minus one) liked and respected him too. Amare came to NY in no small part in order to play for him. But maybe D’Antoni was too mellow for Melo. Maybe Woodson is better equipped to crack the whip. Last night he said he’s gonna “make damn sure” that players are held accountable. Maybe all those years in Utah drained out whatever “street” D’Antoni had him and maybe only some street smart tough love can wipe that self-satisfied smile off Melo’s mug. Goodbye Mike, hello Mike, and let’s go Mets.

JUST IN CASE...

...you were wondering why I suddenly shifted the focus of this blog onto the sports scene when
1. I don't really follow sports that closely (compared to others like: teddyvegas.blogspot.com)
2. I'm certainly no expert, nor do I have any inside info you can't find easily elsewhere
3. I am more a man of words than action, and sport is all about action...

...unless of course, you're the spectator, in which case its a feast for anyone with an appetite for the metaphorical or even the metaphysical. A very simple and quick search reveals that there is great wisdom and wit to be found on the diamonds, gridirons, courts, rinks and numerous fields of collision and concussion.

"The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It's that they stay out all night looking for it." - Casey Stengal


Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very un-orderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can't get you off. --Bill Veeck

The key to managing is keeping the 12 guys who hate you away from the 12 who are undecided. -- Leo Durocher

"Baseball is religion without the mischief." - Thomas Boswell

"A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings." - Earl Wilson (Earl Wilson?)

"My sister's expecting a baby,but I don't know yet if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt." - Chuck Nevitt

"Kids are great. That's one of the best things about our business, all the kids you get to meet. It's a shame they have to grow up to be regular people and come to the games and call you names." - Charles Barkley

"The difference between involvement and commitment is like ham and eggs. The chicken is involved; the pig is committed.” - Martina Navratilova

"When we started, it was based on lies. It's changing now. There are no secrets in the business. You've got to come with the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. It's becoming very confusing." - Don King

"Any American boy can be a basketball star if he grows up, and up, and up." - Bill Vaughn

I've found that prayers work best when you've got the bigger players. --Knute Rockne

'My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7.- David Beckham

Catherine Russell.

Ellen and I Caught her live a few years back at a local library in Hastings-on Hudson (thanks to friends J.and B. who live there and are plugged into all the cool cultural happenings)
and she’s the real thing. Her dad was Louis Armstrong’s long-time musical director and her main thing is vintage jazz/blues songs of the bygone days of honky-tonk bars and dance halls. Check out more at:

http://catherinerussell.net/html/about.php

This song isn’t vintage, though it sounds like it. It was written by the eclectic and one of a kind Rachelle Garniez, who I saw one night on a street corner in the East Village playing the accordion and blowing minds with her musicianship and Marx Brothers worthy comic flair and wit. Couldn’t find Cat singing the song on camera, so here’s the audio with pictures…you can see lots of Cat and Rachelle on YouTube.

Survey says….

Just got off the phone with an independent (so she said ) market researcher who asked if I’d be willing to answer a few questions about current political and economic issues…and it didn’t take long before I realized what was cookin…it started benignly ( albeit inanely) with questions like:

In general, are you pleased with the direction of our nation?

Which issues are most important for the U.S. Senate to focus on this year?

Do you believe that raising taxes will have a positive effect on our fragile economy?

Whoops…how did that “fragile” get into an “non-partisan” survey?

And before I could say “Independent market research my ass…” she was off and running with questions so stunningly partisan I had to stop her a few times and ask her to repeat herself slowly (very slowly, cause I was trying to write some of them down) and here’s some highlights:

Do you support an in-depth audit of the Democrats' $789 billion stimulus package to find out where your tax dollars went?

Are you in favor of unionizing Department of Homeland Security personnel such as airport screeners who could endanger our national security or bring commerce and travel in our country to a standstill if they strike?

Do you believe President Obama's foreign policies have strengthened the resolve of those who seek to do us harm?

Are you in favor of a new federal government bureaucracy to act as the "single payer" of all healthcare expenses?

Do you support allowing scientists to "manufacture" and destroy human embryos for the purpose of extracting stem cells for research?

Do you believe Republican candidates do best when they promote our core principles of lower taxes, smaller government and a strong, proud America?

I got so tired of saying ( as she get tired of hearing) “That’s a loaded question—I won’t answer it.” (and that's the nicest answer I had) --that we called it quits after I tried in vain to extract some information regarding who was the brains behind the bullshit. Only consolation was that she said many respondents had also declined to answer many questions. I was tempted to vent some steam but decided it probably wouldn’t faze her a bit (she actually sounded a bit embarrassed and I even felt sorry for her since she was just doing her job and didn’t sound the least bit interested in anything I might have to add that wasn't a direct answer to a survey question) and would most likely go unrecorded anyway.





I'm still kinda hot about that call. Wish I coulda found out who was behind it, but really, does it matter? Like once I find out I'm gonna do...what?




Ellen and I watched HBO movie Game Change about Sarah Palin and the McCain campaign. Pretty good. Mostly smart and believable dialogue, good cast, crisply put together. And about halfway through I'm feeling sympathetic to the McCain staffers who are suffering mightily from the consequences of their hasty and ill-considered choice of Veep candidate. And then it dawns on me that these poor saps are the real bad guys. Palin may be an ignorant, self-involved, opportunistic hypocrite and phony through and through, but the folks who put her in the game are something even worse. They are the total cynics who cheered her when she played the part, stuck to the script and fooled the public (and the media) and then panicked and punted when she went "rogue" and revealed her true colors. The whole game is debasing any way you slice it since winning trumps all other considerations and these campaign pros are all in it for the win. One or two characters are shown to have some measure of integrity and principle, but it's still hard to sympathize when you realize that only in defeat do these masters of deceit and manipulation stop to smell the shit stuck to their shoes.

Ok, I can shift gears and try to chase away those dark clouds of caustic cynicism or I can run with it and use it to cue up my latest list of...



Note: In my efforts to keep this blog active and refreshed on an almost daily basis, I've had to cultivate some strange habits Now, in addition to keeping notes and files on various topics and issues, I also keep running lists of such things as Pet Peeves, jokes, puns, images, news stories, random anecdotes culled from all manner of sources...not the least of which is the day-to-day contributions from friends and colleagues. And since most of my colleagues are "Creative-Services" types, it should come as no surprise that the majority of their contributions would be best described as gripes, complaints, annoyances and assorted other Grumpy Gus-isms that keep us happy and content in our cozy offices and cubicles of dysfunction and disdain. So here's a selection featuring some items of my own combined with assorted others that I somehow took the time to record or remember. Thanks to all for keeping this file fitter and fatter than all the others.

People obsess about what they'll put in their mouths and stomachs, but not about what they put in their eyes and ears.
How is eating a couple of Big Macs with Fries and a coke any different than watching Fox News or American Idol?
(Ok, I know it's different, but work with me here people...)

Women are always asking why men never put the (toilet) seat down . But you never hear men asking women why they don't put the seat up.

Parents/people who talk baby talk to kids who are no longer babies.

The toilets that flush themselves often flush while you're still sitting on them...which is not hygenic! All that splashing?
What was wrong with the handle? I did it with my foot...no muss, no fuss. Bet the auto flush wastes more water too.

Elevator eaters. Are you really that hungry? Can't wait the uh, oh maybe 16 seconds it takes to get from the lobby to your floor that you have to open that sandwich now and take a big bite out of it as the mayo oozes out of the side and drips onto...? Well, I hope it's your shoes.

You're using your speakerphone on the train? Now we can hear you and the person on the other line? Because....?
Oh, I see, you also want to be able to write, or read, or go through your handbag at the same time...Okay, I see...my bad.

Al Gore. Haven't seen or heard from him in years, but he still bugs me.

Ditto John Edwards.

First you cover nose and mouth, then you sneeze. First cover, then sneeze. Got it?

I know, life is hard. It's a lot of work. Especially when you're raising a family. But still, is it that hard to put the shopping cart in the cart holder space (what do you call it? The cart corral? ) or at the very least move it out of the parking space?

Why is it rude or distasteful to bite your fingernails in public but not to clip them? At least the biter usually eats the nail...the clipper is shooting pieces all over the room.

Skin tight jeans. On anyone. I can't breathe just looking at them.

When you toss it at the garbage can and miss...follow up the shot, and make the lay-up. Don't wait for someone else to grab the rebound. For christ sake...who do you think you are? Carmelo Anthony?

Take the clothes off your dog. Now!

"Let me ask you a question..." is no way to start a conversation...unless you're Joe McCarthy or Ken Starr.

Every pump at the Gas station is occupied. You just finished filling your tank. But now you leave your car where it is while you go to the bathroom, buy a chili dog, grab a soda, check out the newspaper headlines. I hope that Chili Dog gives you the runs.

Fathers who say " I gotta babysit the kids tonite." Sorry fella, too late, they're your kids now. Gonna be your kids for a while too. Better get used to it...cause there's no tip or carfare home after they're tucked in for the night.

Guitar Hero. Like American Idol. Innocent fun right? And people enjoy it...but all the same it just makes me sick.

You're giving a presentation. It's all data and numbers. And more than once you say " The numbers speak for themselves."
So why aren't you letting them?

Couples who sit on the same side of the booth when there is no one on the other side.

Taking 20 napkins, using one, throwing rest in trash. You think those napkins grow on trees? Well, you’re right.

Referring to oneself as mommy or daddy when talking to your dog.

Drivers who are unyielding at yield signs.

Spending countless weeks or months researching, digging, putting two and two together and realizing that the official story is a crock... only to be accused of being a sucker for conspiracy theories.

Taking more food at a Buffet table than you can eat.

Asking the waiter (who will have to ask the chef/cook) to customize every element of your meal…

Paying for a bagel and coffee with a credit card while six people are waiting behind you on line

Jelly beans that don’t remotely taste like anything their color would indicate.

Greeting Cards with political jokes.

Callers who leaves their phone number too fast or incoherently.

It’s 'supposedly' not 'supposebly'.

Theatre seats with one armrest for two seats. What’s the protocol? First come first served? Ultimately (among the civil minded) it then goes unused by either party.

“You can skip this ad in 5 seconds”. Has anyone ever not skipped the ad?

The plastic hinges on CD cases that break just by breathing on them.

The ranking of people and things that can’t/shouldn’t be quantified ie: He/she/it’s the number one/best/finest/most amazing musician/writer/actor/restaurant/….blah blah blah.

Anti-climactic ends to long lists.



I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
Abraham Lincoln

A Correction.

Seems I was a bit hasty in choosing the vintage ads for last post. My search criteria should have included some mention of words like "real" "genuine" or "actual". By not specifying my requests I mistakenly included at least one (and possibly two or three) ads that were bogus. The Japanese Proz-Zak ad was part of a vintage advertisement art contest in which designers created ads to look like the old ones--and I got fooled. I've lost the thread of my search history, but I now suspect that perhaps one or two others in my collection were from the same pool of parodies. I'll leave it to you to suss out which those might be--I suspect it may be the guys wrestling in their girdle/underwear...and maybe one or two of the outrageously sexist scenarios that push the "It's a man's world" ethos to improbable limits. In a way, it may still be interesting even if they are phony, to the extent that they succeed at fooling us (certainly me) because we/I recognize(d) how close to the truth of their time they are/were.

Anyway, to make up for it here are a few more...








The copy is the epitome of eloquent euphemism.










"This is your opportunity to gain quick popularity..." Someday I'll write an ad this good.




For the kid who has everything...except a parent with a brain.










One of many such ads for this product, and Company founder N.K. Fairbank was also University of Chicago Board Chairman. But to be fair, that was back in the late 1800s...













...by 1952 advertisers had become much more enlightened...











The Knicks are driving me nuts!

I keep trying to figure out what's really wrong (aside from lack of focus, defensive doldrums, general lack of spirit and a host of other factors cited by all the B'ball pundits and frustrated fans) and my latest speculation is that it has something to do with the influence of playing in New York City. The Big Apple is a rotten place for learning, growing, developing and nurturing. It's a playground for established movers and shakers. It's a town of big money, big media, big business and big egos. It's the heart of the "Empire" State. It's the "What have you done for me lately?" city. It's the Yankees with their insufferable sense of entitlement. It's the world of Fashion with its emphasis on style over substance. It's Wall St. and the big swinging dicks of finance. And now, more than ever, the people who go to see the games at the Garden are more apt to be deep pocketed, over indulged expense account corporate types rather than hard core hoops enthusiasts who really know and love the game. And Carmelo (and to a lesser extent Amare) came to New York with all the baggage that made the weight of expectations too great to withstand anything less than instant success. Dolan is the problem too. He wants stars and glamour and all that crap and probably hasn't got a clue about what it takes to build a winning team. I feel sorry for D'Antoni. I think he does know what it takes, but he's a victim of Big Apple Blues too.

Anywho...


Here's something I found years ago when I got in the habit of sending e-mails to my son Eli with interesting/inspiring quotes. I don't know exactly where I found it, but if memory serves, it was a website created by a young man who was traveling the world after abandoning a budding career (in corporate law maybe?) During his travels he kept a journal/log (I guess that's a blog) in which he shared thoughts, ideas etc. He put a much longer list together over time and I liked it and sent it to Eli. I think he had a clever headline for it but I can't remember that either. Anyway, here's what I kept of it.



Accept a breath mint if someone offers you one.

Never give anybody a fondue set or anything painted avocado green

Plant zucchini only if you have lots of friends.

Take off the convention badge as soon as you leave the convention hall.

Remember, the wrapping on a gift sometimes says more than the gift itself.

Learn the word for " love " in many languages.

When you are totally exhausted but have to keep going, wash your face and hands and put on clean socks and a clean shirt.

Check for toilet paper before sitting down.

Don't sleep all you want...just all you need.

Live an honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll get to enjoy it a second time.

Purchase one piece of original art each year, even if it's just a small oil painting by a high school student.

Don't do business with anyone who has a history of suing people.

Never pick up anything off the floor of a cab.

Leave loose change where a child can find it.

When travelling the back roads, stop whenever you see a sign that reads "Honey for Sale."

Don't outlive your money.

Let some things remain mysterious.

Never eat a sugared doughnut when wearing a dark suit.

Hire people more for their judgement than for their talents.

Love someone who doesn't deserve it.


AND FINALLY, ONE OF MY FAVORITE PHOTOS. I HAVE THIS POSTED ON MY OFFICE WALL.