I lied.  I did watch the Olympics.  

More than I thought I would.  Even had it on in my office where I became reacquainted with the arcane and obscure like Team Handball and Archery.  So thought I'd use this time to combine my reinvigorated interest in Bacronymic time-wasting with some of the events they've been showing between the commercials for the last fortnight.

If any of you out there wish to contribute one or more Bacronyms of your own, I'd be mighty proud and pleased to post em.

And with that expectation in mind I provide you below with available options and openings in the Olympic Sports list compiled expressly for your convenience...however, do not hesitate to tackle any you wish.  Just cause I wrote one, doesn't preclude you from piling on and making me think...."man, I wish I had thought of that."

Also, sports are hyperlinked!  (just click on sport name for background info) 

ARCHERY: Aim, release, check hole exactitude, repeat, yawn.

BADMINTON: But a defeat means I’m not totally overmatched next.

BASKETBALL: Belize, Armenia, Sudan, Kazakhstan expect to beat Americans?  Laugh. Laugh.

BOXING: Bums overseeing xenophobia. It's naughty graft.

KAYAK: Keel-less aquatic yawl acrobatics. Kaopectate?

CYCLING

DIVING: Don’t incline verticality—it’s not gold.

EQUESTRIAN: Equine quest. Usually elitist sport that rarely includes any negroes.

FIELD HOCKEY

GYMNASTICS

HANDBALL

JUDO:  Japanese understand. Dutch?  Outclassed. 

ROWING: Repetitive Oaring within incredibly narrow gunwales. 

SAILING

SHOOTING

SOCCER / FOOTBALL

SWIMMING

SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMING:  Silly? Yes? No? Crazy hard routines. Outrageous. Nevertheless incredibly zany eccentric dynamic.  So what.  It's mad makeup! It's nautical Girls!  

TABLE TENNIS: Truly amazing. Blazing lateral equilibrium twisting excitement—No! No!!! I’m speechless!

TAEKWONDO

TENNIS

TRACK AND FIELD: The runners are cool, knowing as nature does, fast is essentially latently determined.

TRIATHLON : The really insane athletes. Total Hell. Like overlong nightmare.

VOLLEYBALL

WATER POLO: Water and throwing?  Extremely rough. Play on land! Okay?

WEIGHTLIFTING: Where extreme inverted gravity horrifies the less inclined female to invoke Neanderthals.  Girls.

WRESTLING: